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EMSWORLD.com | MAY 2016 37 Robbins quietly returned to the fire station with a heavy heart. "I blamed myself for that child's death," Robbins recalls as his eyes well up. "But I never told anyone; not a soul. I tried to bury those feelings deep down, but they never went away. It always seemed to creep up on me, especially during pediatric calls, even the ones that were minor." Robbins recalls hearing that the child was under water for 30 minutes and that any efforts would have been futile. "That didn't matter, and it didn't help," Robbins says. Confdence from Education Fast-forward eight years to when Robbins and I met for the first time during a pedi- atric resuscitation course. There he was, a youthful presence sitting in the front row with his eyes intently focused on every slide. By day's end I noticed he'd filled a notebook with handwritten notes. I had no idea why this young kid was so engaged but I could sense something special about him. For an instructor, there's nothing better than an engaged student. What I didn't realize at the time was this was Robbins' chance to crawl out of the deep space he had been living in for so many years. "I thought of this as my chance to finally beat this internal conflict I'd been fighting for so long," Robbins recalls. At its core, the course we rolled out that day emphasized on-scene resuscitation for pediatric patients in cardiac arrest. Our mantra was "Let's treat kids like adults and stay on scene in order to regain a pulse." This struck a chord with Robbins. "I felt my ACLS skills were very strong and just then realized that the algorithm for pediatrics was no different," he says. "It was an eye- opener and my confidence level definitely improved. Whether or not I could perform, if the time ever came, was a different story." Robbins only had to wait a week to find out if his long-held secret would interfere with his newly found confidence. The tones at Station 80 drove him and his crew into action and they raced a few blocks away to a 2-year-old drowning, the same call he had eight years prior. "My adrenaline surge wasn't being shy, that's for sure," Robbins recalls. He went through the prearrival discus- sion with his crew. One crew member would start chest compressions, the other was to address the airway with a BVM, and he was prepared to place an IO and administer epi- nephrine 1:10,000. He knew the dose of 1.2 mL prior to arrival. Juan Cardona, Coral Springs Fire Depart- ment's EMS division chief, also heard the call and decided to rush to the scene as well. He arrived only minutes after Rescue 80 and remembers the scene vividly. "The crew was at the poolside providing high-quality CPR, the epinephrine had been given and the airway was being upgraded. Lt. Robbins was leading his team and things were amazingly calm; there was no urgen- cy to leave," Cardona recalls. "That child received great care and ultimately achieved return of spontaneous circulation (ROSC). It was an amazing feeling." Fast-forward two weeks and Robbins and his crew were on shift again. This time they were toned out to an unresponsive 1-year- old girl who had choked on a grape. They arrived at the parking lot of a multifam- ily apartment building to a police officer holding a lifeless child in his arms, wait- ing to transfer her to their care. Robbins remembers saying to the officer, "Put her down right here." As his partners started CPR, Robbins suc- tioned a mouth full of blood secondary to the multiple finger sweeps attempted by the Av a i l a b l e R e s o u r ce s There is a growing concern that suicides are affecting the emergency services at higher levels than ever before. Fortunately an increasing number of resources offering providers education, assistance and counseling are available. » The Center for Public Safety Innovation (@CPSITraining) at St. Petersburg College has been grant-funded to develop a suicide prevention training-of-trainers course. The eight-hour course provides an overview of the global suicide issue in the United States, and breaks down the problem at the local level. The suicide prevention course is broken into five modules that include information about suicidal behaviors and communication, prevention efforts, protocol and policy development, issues revolving around stigma and how to care for survivors. The training is designed for fire service trainers, chaplains and EAP representatives who wish to teach suicide prevention and intervention techniques within a fire service setting. » The Center for Patient Safety (@PtSafetyEMS) in Missouri has recently launched workshops to help identify and support "second victims." These are healthcare team members involved in an unanticipated patient event, medical error and/or patient-related injury who have become traumatized by the event. Frequently, these individuals feel personally responsible for the patient outcome. Many feel as though they have failed the patient, second- guessing their clinical skills and knowledge base. » The Code Green Campaign (@CodeGreenEMS) is another group bringing desperately needed attention to the issues of PTSD, suicide, depression, addiction and other mental health problems in public safety. » Mental Health Resource Toolkit: Additional mental health resources can be found online at EMSWorld.com/12064878.